There are many complicating factors in this life of ours, and two of the most confusing are fear and pain. For the most part, we try to avoid these issues whenever possible, but that seems to be a mistake.  Since they seem to be everywhere in mortality, it only makes sense that they must be purposeful and useful in our growth and development.  

Fear is not the deciding factor in managing life, and pain does not determine who wins. Yes, fear of the unknown can stir up anxiety, and uncertainty may take its toll in our lives. But ironically, we need them both. With that in mind, they need to be faced and embraced before we can sufficiently learn the lessons that only they can teach us.

Knowledge of Heavenly Father’s plan will enable us to face our fears and rise above them; not simply because of who we are but because of who Heavenly Father is. All of the issues mentioned above can be confronted and defeated when we understand them. And yet, until they are understood, they may appear to be too great to confront. With this in mind, these challenges need to be managed effectively.  If we try to numb them out, run from them, or ignore them, they may seem unbearable. But they’re not.  

It may also seem that life is intent on knocking us down, but ultimately fear and pain only have the power that we give them. And while we may be unable to defeat them quickly, we can manage them, and ultimately, we can take back our power.

In Mark 5:36 we find the guidance to step forward boldly: “Do not fear, only believe.”  And Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf wrote: No one likes to fail but we mortals do not become champions without making mistakes (end quote).

 Life seems to have the power to knock us down, but it is we who must choose whether to stay down or get up. We can be bent or broken by the challenges in life, but once again, ultimately it is we who must decide how we manage the battles.  

With this in mind, never underestimate yourself. You are more than you can comprehend. Your strengths will grow with every battle you face. Your clarity will expand with every decision you make to move forward. Nothing is wasted. Our success is our responsibility. Nobody can hand us success.  To me, what this means is that we must never let our mistakes and poor choices determine either our happiness of the present, or our fear of the future.  

It’s not about making the problems go away, but rather, it’s about learning from them until we can rise above them. Fortunately, we’re never too old to alter our course. So, set new goals. Dream new dreams. Learn the lessons that only pain and problems can teach. And most importantly, follow the “Light.” Life and light are endless. Enjoy the journey. Spread the word.

John Waterbury is a retired Clinical Mental Health Counselor who has lived in Utah since 1984 when he moved to Bountiful with his wife and four children. Since then, he has written a weekly column for several years for the Davis County Clipper titled “The Dear John Letters” which was also used throughout the intermountain West focusing on addiction and mental health problems. This new column will focus on mental health and life management issues.